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Galactic News: The Thargoids have Returned

17 JUN 3303

Over the past few days, media streams have been abuzz with news that the so-called Unknown Ships are in fact Thargoid vessels, as many had speculated. The Federal Times, having spent several days confirming sources and authenticating reports, has now published an in-depth account of the events that led to the revelation.

It is understood that Professor Ishmael Palin, a leading authority on xenobiological research, determined the vessels’ origin by comparing data from the Unknown Ships with older Thargoid samples. Palin’s experiments resulted in conclusive proof that the Unknown Ships were Thargoid.

A short time later, Palin’s data was seized by Federal agents, who attempted to convey it to a Federal research facility. But in a shocking turn of events, the ship carrying the data was attacked en route to its destination. There is strong evidence to suggest the attack was executed by Thargoid vessels.

The incapacitation of the Federal vessel resulted in the information entering the public domain. But the cryptic nature of the data meant that The Federal Times was compelled to conduct further research before publishing its report.

In its story, The Federal Times also posited that the barnacles may be of Thargoid origin, given their relationship with the Thargoid ships. But it stopped short of suggesting a link between the Thargoids and the Unknown Probes and Artefacts, which many also believe to be nonhuman objects.

Meanwhile, the public mood was best summarised by Kelvin Masters, a freelance journalist, who contributed the following to the Rewired news feed:

“Look at the history books. Every time we’ve met the Thargoids, there’s bloodshed. We need to prepare for the worst. I mean, they’ve already attacked human ships! What kind of contingencies do the superpowers have in place? And what do we know about the Thargoids’ capabilities? What kind of weapons do they have? What kind of defences? And why did the Federation take Palin’s data? Were they trying to keep it quiet? These questions need to be answered!”

The leaders of the galaxy’s three superpowers are expected to make statements shortly.